Kittylitterosaurus erectus

CAT: Wow, Heidi! Did you see this story about dinosaur bones?
DOG: I like bones. Yummy. Where’s it from?
CAT: It’s from a place called British Columbia, which is in Canada.
DOG: That’s where LeaderOfPack’s friend Dr C. E. of Vancouver lives. Is it anywhere near Cromer?
CAT: I think so. Just go into the garden, past the chicken run and keep going, and it’s somewhere round there. Anyway, she sent CatButler the story, and here it is.
DOG: It’s about Bones!
CAT: It’s about Kitty Litter!
DOG: Are we talking about the same thing?
CAT: It’s about Kitty Litter. What’s not to like? Apparently people in British Columbia …
DOG: That’s the place behind the chicken run, yes?
CAT: That’s it. These people in British Columbia like digging holes…
DOG: Wow! I love digging holes!!!
CAT: Will you let me finish?
DOG: Sorry.
CAT: Anyway, these people like digging holes to find rocks called shales. They grind up the shales to make kitty litter, so I have something to piddle on, and scatter around the house when I’ve done a poo.
DOG: Cat poo. Mmmm. Yummy. I love a hot snack.
CAT: You’re disgusting, you know that?
DOG: A dog’s gotta do. Doo-doo. So that’s where kitty litter comes from. Ground-up shales. Are there, you know … bones … in the rocks?
CAT: That’s the point. You saw the story. These rocks have dinosaur bones in them. Very big. Very crunchy.
DOG: Not much taste though.
CAT: Well, anyway, a lot of people called palaeontologists are upset because the bones are part of Our Precious Fossil Heritage, and shouldn’t be ground up into kitty litter, and someone should do something to stop this.
DOG: I thought you liked kitty litter?
CAT: I do. But you can make kitty litter out of practically anything, as long as I can scatter it all over the floor. It doesn’t have to be rocks. Especially not with bones in.
DOG: Did I mention that I like bones?
CAT: [wearily] Yes. All the meowling time.
DOG: Sorry. Anyway, seems a pity to grind up perfectly good bones, even if they are made into kitty litter.
CAT: That’s kind of the point. But wait, there’s more.
DOG: There is?
CAT: Yes, it says that every other part of Canada has laws to stop Our Precious Fossil Heritage being ground up into kitty litter – every part except British Columbia.
DOG: But wait – it says here that the Government in British Columbia is taking steps to protect Our Precious Fossil Heritage.
CAT: Yes, but it doesn’t have teeth.
DOG: I can haz teeth!
CAT: So have I. Big deal. I was speaking metaphorically.
DOG: Oh.
CAT: Metaphorically, as in the Province of Alberta, which is next to British Columbia …
DOG: I once met a very nice poodle called Alberta.
CAT: [cattily] As I was saying, Alberta has lots of dinosaur bones, and laws to protect them so they get put in museums where people can admire them, rather than getting ground up into kitty litter.
DOG: Hang on, I’ve just remembered something. About British Columbia. And Our Precious Fossil Heritage.
CAT: What’s that, then?
DOG: You won’t remember this – you were only a tiny kitteh at the time, but earlier this year LeaderOfPack went to Canada to look at fossils. He saw them in the Royal Ontario Museum in Toronto. These fossils came from British Columbia. Something called the Burgess Shales. LeaderOf Pack says that they are among the most important fossils in the world.
CAT: Shales? In British Columbia?
DOG: Yes.
CAT: So, theoretically, there’s nothing to stop someone grinding them up into kitty litter?
DOG: Dunno. I think the Burgess Shales are in a National Park or something. You know, where I have to be on a lead and LeaderOfPack has to collect up my poos and put them in a special bin.
CAT: Yup. You really are disgusting.
DOG: I don’t have to have kitty litter, though.
CAT: Fair point.
DOG: Makes you think, though, doesn’t it?