Grown Not Made – a Guest Post from Crox Minor

Yesterday, at the Lifeboat Café, in Cromer, me and Crox Major were enjoying our sausages, egg and chips

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when:
“Hey Dad!”
“Hmm?”
“ You know it says ,“Grown, Not Made” on this Heinz tomato ketchup bottle?”

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“Yeah?”
“Well, wouldn’t it be amazing if bottles of tomato ketchup grew on trees? We could send them to developing countries so people would never grow hungry again!”

This had me thinking, that, so many of the world’s problems could be solved by everyday objects that we overlook or take for granted.
For example:

– Metal and plastic from food packaging could be cleaned and made into something useful, like hospital equipment, or it could be recycled and made into spare parts for vehicles. This would save a lot of money, and lives.

– Old bits of wood and metal tins could be made into musical instruments.

– Worn out old shoes could be made into nest boxes for passing birds.

– Old postcards could be used as coasters for cups of tea, in case of a spillage.

– Dog crap could be used as ammunition in war instead of bullets!

On second thoughts, maybe that isn’t such a good idea…

About cromercrox

Cromercrox is a recovering palaeontologist, author and editor who lists his recreations as writing, beachcombing, playing hard rock organ, supporting Norwich City FC and falling asleep.
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7 Responses to Grown Not Made – a Guest Post from Crox Minor

  1. steffi suhr says:

    Oh, the dog-crap-for-ammunition idea is very good! I remember a silly comic book from ages ago where the loser in a bet would be bombarded with cat shit, but then the “heroes” had a really hard time scraping enough together. Dog crap is way more readily available, isn’t it?

    I like your other ideas too, keep them coming :-)

  2. The combination of dog-crap-as-ammunition and a contribution aus Deutschland reminded me of this German poo-themed cartoon classic, which Steffi may know. A great favourite with our two children.

  3. Jo Brodie says:

    Great ideas :)

    You might like the prototypes of the ‘AidPod’ by a charity called ColaLife. They are trying to design a plastic container that can fit in between the bottles of Coca Cola as they’re transported around the world, in large crates. There’s a lot of space near the tops of the bottles (because they’re bigger at the bottom than the top) and they came up with the clever idea to make use of this space that’s otherwise just filled with air.

    Inside the AidPods they want to put medicines or oral rehydration salts (these help people who’ve been very ill with diarrhoea) and, because EVERYONE in the world can get hold of Coca Cola drinks everyone would be able to get hold of the medicines too. Coca Cola’s been around for a long time and it has all the systems in place locally to deliver the drinks to people, even in remote areas. So while Coca Cola is delivering its drinks to people, it might as well be carrying the AidPods in the air spaces too – clever! http://www.colalife.org/about/aidpod/

    Jo

  4. Very sensible ideas!

    When I was around your age, my family would go for hikes on most Sundays, in the North York Moors or surrounding areas. We quickly learned that if there were any cow pats or sheep poo on the ground, we had to walk BEHIND my Dad, because if you were in front of him he’d kick the poo at you and it would hit the back of your legs. So I agree that poo would make most effective ammunition.

    I have access to seemingly unlimited supplies of cat poo if anyone would like to buy it from me!

  5. Bob O'H says:

    Cat poo is best used as a chemical weapon – The Beast has been conducting research on this for several years. Unfortunately I had to leave the lid of the containment behind when I left Finland.

  6. KristiV says:

    Oeufs sur le Plat avec les Pommes Frites

    Ooops, wrong post. ;-)