{"id":3,"date":"2010-12-19T12:24:31","date_gmt":"2010-12-19T12:24:31","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/occamstypewriter.org\/notranting\/?p=3"},"modified":"2010-12-19T17:53:46","modified_gmt":"2010-12-19T17:53:46","slug":"i%e2%80%99m-a-celebrity-scientist-%e2%80%93-get-me-out-of-here","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/occamstypewriter.org\/notranting\/2010\/12\/19\/i%e2%80%99m-a-celebrity-scientist-%e2%80%93-get-me-out-of-here\/","title":{"rendered":"I\u2019m a celebrity scientist \u2013 get me out of here"},"content":{"rendered":"

Henry Gee’s recent post on Dancing With the Scientists<\/a>, bemoaning the lack of scientists in the currently ubiquitous celebrity reality shows, reminded me that a few years ago I had written a piece about exactly this, which I promised I would dig out and re-post.<\/em><\/p>\n

Anyway, after a fumble through the archives I have managed to track it down. I have updated one or two of the references, but otherwise have left it unchanged. So without further ado:<\/em><\/p>\n

———————————————————————————<\/p>\n

Science is often accused of being inaccessible to the general public.<\/em><\/strong> Scientists\u00a0counter that this is because scientists don\u2019t get enough media exposure. This includes\u00a0both real scientists, and people playing scientists in TV dramas. We can all agree\u00a0that there are less TV shows with scientists in them than shows about policemen, or\u00a0doctors.<\/p>\n

But I think I have come up with a solution. Since the public\u2019s appetite for reality TV\u00a0seems to be insatiable, let\u2019s give them what they want, AND get ourselves some much\u00ad-needed exposure.<\/p>\n

I give you:<\/p>\n

Celebrity Scientist Big Brother <\/span><\/strong><\/span><\/em><\/p>\n

The beauty of this is that this idea can be franchised; you could have different\u00a0versions for different scientific disciplines, or one for just your own Department, or a\u00a0national all-star version, or an \u00a0international one. The possibilities are endless.<\/p>\n

There are, however, some easy rules to enable you to select the contestants for\u00a0maximum viewing figures. The people inhabiting the house\/jungle\/island should\u00a0include:<\/p>\n

\u2022 at least one person recently dramatically publicly disgraced and in search of\u00a0rehabilitation [judging from the plethora of recent scientific misconduct scandals, no shortage of these folk]<\/p>\n

\u2022 a person who has undergone extensive cosmetic surgery or dental work<\/p>\n

\u2022 a minor member of the British aristocracy, or a Lord, Sir or Right Hon<\/a><\/p>\n

\u2022 one person who is faking the whole thing<\/p>\n

\u2022 one or more relentless self-publicists<\/p>\n

\u2022 one or more people who are extensively tattoo-ed, and\/or pierced in improbable\u00a0places [May be a tad difficult to fill this role with more senior scientists, but you never know]<\/p>\n

\u2022 one monosyllabic youth person given to grunting and mumbling \u2018Wicked, dude”<\/span> or “Way cool”<\/span> at random intervals\u00a0[male PhD students are the obvious candidates here]<\/p>\n

\u2022 one or more people who are pathologically argumentative<\/p>\n

\u2022 one person teetering on the edge of a public mini-nervous breakdown [Given the\u00a0current cuts to science budgets, especially in the UK, any head of Department or Faculty Dean should be a good bet]<\/p>\n

\u2022 at least one person who even the other contestants<\/em> find weird and unsettling<\/p>\n

\u2022 one person who you thought would never be seen dead on a show like this. For maximum effect this\u00a0person should subsequently storm out in a cloud of invective and denunciations [Think\u00a0Germaine Greer<\/a> or Johnny Rotten<\/a>, for UK-based readers. Nobel Prizewinners might be a starting point in looking for scientific candidates.]<\/p>\n

\u2022 several people who used to be vaguely well-known, typically for having once\u00a0appeared on television, but have now largely faded from view.<\/p>\n

This mix should ensure plenty of good reality TV, including shouting, swearing\u00a0arguments, tears and perhaps even a fight or two.<\/em><\/p>\n

Of course, some contestants may fulfil several of the above criteria at the same\u00a0time<\/em>. If so, so much the better.<\/p>\n

Finally, all the participants need to share some basic personality traits. They should\u00a0be able to talk tirelessly about themselves and their work until the small hours, and\u00a0should believe unquestioningly that their merest utterance is deeply fascinating and\u00a0demands the rapt attention of all those listening.<\/p>\n

\u2018They\u2019ll all be full professors, then\u2019<\/span><\/strong> commented one of my friends on hearing this.<\/p>\n

Hmmm.<\/p>\n

You might think that.<\/p>\n

I couldn\u2019t possibly comment.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Henry Gee’s recent post on Dancing With the Scientists, bemoaning the lack of scientists in the currently ubiquitous celebrity reality shows, reminded me that a few years ago I had written a piece about exactly this, which I promised I … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":13,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[4,11,6,9],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-3","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-grumbling","category-humour","category-procrastination","category-the-life-scientific"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/occamstypewriter.org\/notranting\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/occamstypewriter.org\/notranting\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/occamstypewriter.org\/notranting\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/occamstypewriter.org\/notranting\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/13"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/occamstypewriter.org\/notranting\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=3"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/occamstypewriter.org\/notranting\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/occamstypewriter.org\/notranting\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=3"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/occamstypewriter.org\/notranting\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=3"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/occamstypewriter.org\/notranting\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=3"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}