{"id":308,"date":"2009-10-18T19:56:00","date_gmt":"2009-10-18T19:56:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/occamstypewriter.org\/rpg\/2009\/10\/18\/on_mass_divided_by_volume\/"},"modified":"2009-10-18T19:56:00","modified_gmt":"2009-10-18T19:56:00","slug":"on_mass_divided_by_volume","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/occamstypewriter.org\/rpg\/2009\/10\/18\/on_mass_divided_by_volume\/","title":{"rendered":"On mass divided by volume"},"content":{"rendered":"

Just how annoying is Luke Skywalker? Man, I’d like to fetch him one across the self-righteous chops. And this whole rebellion schtick? Just what’s going on there? I mean, you’ve got a galaxy with peace and order and what seems to be thriving economies on planets with no apparent means of support or trading advantages; different races, hell, different species<\/em> seem to be able to mix and get on with each other\u2014and the crime that does occur seems to be various lowlifes working it out between themselves. So a bunch of crazy mixed-up kids decide to start blowing things up, it’s hardly any wonder the government’s going to get a little bit pissed off.<\/p>\n

\nI sat with the Younger Pawn on my knee as we watched yet another ludicrous light-fight, saying things like ‘No Sophie, I<\/em> am your father’ and ‘it is your den<\/em> sity’.<\/p>\n

\nWe suddenly realized that I am<\/em> Darth Vader, and you can work out the implications for yourself. Just to help you, here’s a typical day in the office:<\/p>\n

SCENE 4 INT SCIENCE NAVIGATION GROUP – RECEPTION<\/h2>\n

\n_The f1000 Chief Editor, Merkin Jeremy, a tall, confident technocrat,
\nstrides through the assembled coders to the base of the north elevator.
\nThe coders snap to attention; many are uneasy about the new arrival.
\nBut the f1000 editor stands arrogantly tall._\n<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

\n_The door of the elevator opens with a WHOOSH, revealing only
\ndarkness. Then, heavy FOOTSTEPS AND MECHANICAL BREATHING. From this
\nblack void appears rpg, Information Architect. rpg looks over the
\nassemblage as he walks down the ramp._\n<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

\nMerkin Jeremy: rpg, this is an unexpected pleasure. We’re honored by your presence.<\/p>\n

\nInformation Architect: You may dispense with the pleasantries, Editor. I’m here to put you back on schedule.<\/p>\n

\nThe editor turns ashen and begins to shake.<\/em><\/p>\n

\nMJ: I assure you, rpg, the developers are working as fast as they can.<\/p>\n

\nIA: Perhaps I can find new ways to motivate them.<\/p>\n

\nMJ: I tell you, this website will be in beta as planned.<\/p>\n

\nIA: The Chairman does not share your optimistic appraisal of the situation.<\/p>\n

\nMJ: But he asks the impossible. I need more pizza.<\/p>\n

\nIA: Then perhaps you can tell him when he arrives.<\/p>\n

\nMJ (aghast): The Chairman’s coming here?<\/p>\n

\nIA: That is correct, Editor. And he is most displeased with your apparent lack of XML.<\/p>\n

\nMJ: We shall double our efforts.<\/p>\n

\nIA: I hope so, Editor, for your sake. The Chairman is not as forgiving as I am.<\/p>\n

LATER<\/h2>\n

\nChairman: As you can see, my young apprentice, Elsevier has failed. Now
\nwitness the XML of this fully beta-tested and operational website.<\/p>\n

\ninto comlink<\/em>
\nPublish at will, Editor.<\/p>\n

\n———
\nIt’s going to be a long, hard week.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Just how annoying is Luke Skywalker? Man, I’d like to fetch him one across the self-righteous chops. And this whole rebellion schtick? Just what’s going on there? I mean, you’ve got a galaxy with peace and order and what seems … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-308","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/occamstypewriter.org\/rpg\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/308","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/occamstypewriter.org\/rpg\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/occamstypewriter.org\/rpg\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/occamstypewriter.org\/rpg\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/occamstypewriter.org\/rpg\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=308"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/occamstypewriter.org\/rpg\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/308\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/occamstypewriter.org\/rpg\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=308"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/occamstypewriter.org\/rpg\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=308"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/occamstypewriter.org\/rpg\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=308"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}