Blogs are poo

Blogging is mainly writing and writing—according to one informed source—is like having a poo.

I have just seen the excellent Screenwipe, hosted by Charlie Brooker on BBC Four (that’s the TV, not the radio). It doesn’t appear to be on their iPlayer, I’m afraid*. There’s a re-run on at 00:50 but that’s in less than an hour’s time, so you’ll have to be quick!

Brooker usually offers a caustic and often hilarious analysis of TV (for a taste, see this Guardian piece on Dawkins’ program – that’s the science link taken care of) but this evening’s offering was instead an amalgam of interviews with various successful TV writers including Russell T Davies (Dr Who), Graham Linehan (Father Ted, The IT Crowd), Paul Abbott (Shameless, State of Play) and others. What I really enjoyed was that they were all given time to speak and Brooker had clearly asked some good questions.

I was impressed by the tremendous effort that all acknowledged was devoted to the multiple re-writes needed to shape the final piece. Gives us all hope.

But what struck me most was the incredible degree of procrastination that all the writers interviewed admitted to. Linehan made the point that this was necessary to feed the imagination or the sub-conscious, a necessary pre-amble to any good script. And he went on to compare writing to havng a poo: “It’s really hard to go if you don’t need to, but sometimes you can’t stop yourself!”

**Update:* The show is now available on iPlayer (for the next 7 days) for those with access (UK residents?). Well worth a look – there’s much more to it than the crack about pooing…!

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25 Responses to Blogs are poo

  1. Cath Ennis says:

    If blogs are poo, what is Twitter? Rabbit poo?

  2. steffi suhr says:

    That analogy is completely correct! Some things I stew on for ages somewhere almost in my subconscious, others just kind of come exploding out.
    So, along those lines: what’s a ‘floater’?

  3. steffi suhr says:

    I digested this a bit more now. So – in their blogs – some people on NN are a bit loose, I am still a tad constipated, but you seem to be very regular, Stephen.

  4. Richard P. Grant says:

    Do we have poos or do them?

  5. steffi suhr says:

    you do it, then you have it.

  6. Stephen Curry says:

    @cath – spot on! I don’t imagine rabbits dwelling too long on their emissions…
    @Steffi – I have been pretty regular but I wouldn’t rule out future episodes of constipation or diarrhoea! Seriously though Linehan’s image, while a little disgusting, did seem very apposite. I do like to mull things over in the background for a while (without writing anything) before finally sitting down to compose a post, the more reflective ones at any rate. This one popped out within minutes of the end of the program…
    @Richard – either is good…!

  7. Brian Clegg says:

    Linehan made the point that this was necessary to feed the imagination or the sub-conscious, a necessary pre-amble to any good script.
    This is absolute rubbish. Writing is hard work, and most writers are lazy b**gers.

  8. Stephen Curry says:

    Gosh Brian – did I strike a nerve…? Linehan was referring to his composition of comedy scripts so his thought may not be applicable to all types of writing. In any case, I did emphasise that all the writers involved in the programme had agreed that writing was hard work – it’s just that many of them took a long time to sit down and get started. If I remember correctly, Abbott now pays someone to tell him to get on with it…!

  9. Henry Gee says:

    Stephen, I think you’re write. I had been planning a blog about procrastination, but somehow I could never get down to it and just start.

  10. Henry Gee says:

    ‘write’? That’s ‘right’, right?

  11. Stephen Curry says:

    My favourite line about procrastination is that you should never put off till tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow…

  12. Stephen Curry says:

    I’ve just had the chance to read through the article by Charlie Brooker that I mentioned in my post. Not only is it laceratingly funny but he makes some great point about the perception of science. To whet your appetites, here the opening salvo:

    Must be frustrating being a scientist. There you are, incrementally discovering how the universe works via a series of complex tests and experiments, for the benefit of all mankind – and what thanks do you get? People call you “egghead” or “boffin” or “heretic”, and they cave your face in with a rock and bury you out in the wilderness.

    Not literally – not in this day and age – but you get the idea. Scientists are mistrusted by huge swathes of the general public, who see them as emotionless lab-coated meddlers-with-nature rather than, say, fellow human beings who’ve actually bothered getting off their arses to work this shit out…

    Co-incidentally, that last line brings me back to my starting point…

  13. Mike Fowler says:

    Coprophagy. Rabbits do it, do bloggers? Or educated fleas?
    I was lamenting the lack of high quality British TV available on finnish free to air channels yesterday. One of my few moments of homesickness. Imagine my delight when I settled down after dinner to find YLE (their BBC equivalent) was showing a delightful TV play, “Hääkellot” (Wedding Bells). This charming offering was set in Edinburgh (my home town), produced for Channel 4, and co-written by Irvine Welsh. Never have so many curse words left an actress’s mouth in such a short space of time. I loved it!
    Irvine Welsh, however, nicked all his good ideas from Hubert Selby Jr.

  14. Mike Fowler says:

    That should say “Wedding Belles”.

  15. Stephen Curry says:

    Coprophagy. Rabbits do it, do bloggers? Or educated fleas?
    Well, you just consumed what I wrote so I guess the answer has to be yes…
    Glad to hear that you gained access to some decent TV. Now who is Hubert Selby Jr…?

  16. steffi suhr says:

    Mike, doesn’t kellot mean bells (no ‘e’)? Then again, my few words of Finnish are getting rusty 😉
    Abbott now pays someone to tell him to get on with it
    I want that, too.
    No, changed my mind.

  17. Cath Ennis says:

    @Richard: in Soviet Russia, poo has YOU.

  18. Stephen Curry says:

    @Steffi – I want that, too. No, changed my mind.
    Too late! I’ve appointed myself free of charge. Now, stop dithering and get back to work!
    @Cath – do you mean in Russian? Or something more sinister…?

  19. steffi suhr says:

    Stephen, you’re good at that – after telling Brian, too. Ok, will do.

  20. Stephen Curry says:

    Ah – now I get it! And thus are my cultural horizons expanded. Thanks!

  21. Stephen Curry says:

    @Steffi – did I say you could comment? I thought I told you to get on with your work…!
    OK. Stopping now.

  22. Mike Fowler says:

    Steffi, you’re quite correct. Kellot is a plural accusative form of bell (kello). All my grammatical knowledge comes from Finland – I have clue no English grammar about. According to the imdb though, the TV play was originally called “Belles”.

  23. steffi suhr says:

    I gave up trying to learn Finnish when my friend couldn’t stop pointing out that my pronunciation wasn’t quite right (I don’t think it was all that bad!). Well, we were teenagers. Haven’t been in Finland for a looong time, must go see friends again soon. (Actually, one is going to be here this weekend!)

  24. Mike Fowler says:

    Funny thing – native English speakers are used to hearing their language spoken in unusual ways, we generally give up correcting people quickly, or don’t bother at all.
    Language speakers who aren’t used to hearing non-natives butchering attempting their tongue aren’t always quite so relaxed. Although Finnish is strictly phonetic, and the difference between a/ä, o/ö, i/e and u/y can have enormous impact…

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