On sex and corkscrews

We made an interesting observation last night at chez Rohn. Turned out that there was a small gender-based preference for corkscrew usage

Some preferred the ‘Hallelujah’-type corkscrew:

and others the wine-knife type:

We’re still at the stage of data collection, so please would everyone let me know which they prefer, along with their chromosome complement. As a secondary analysis, some ‘Hallelujah’-style have a solid screw and others an ‘open’ type. If you prefer these, also state your screw preference.

I feel we’re onto something big, here.

About rpg

Scientist, poet, gadfly
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20 Responses to On sex and corkscrews

  1. Graham Steel says:

    They let me in the country! Mad fools!
    mwah hah ahhahahahhaha

  2. Brian Derby says:

    Lets avoid discrimination: what about those who don’t like to screw? See below

  3. Richard P. Grant says:

    Works for me, Brian. More data are always good.

  4. Mike Fowler says:

    I always preferred nature’s own bottle opener, saves time raking around the cutlery drawer.

    A waiter’s 2nd best friend, last night.

  5. Henry Gee says:

    I just smash the top off and swig, taking tim later to spit out any glass.

  6. Frank Norman says:

    I prefer the Screwpull. You just keep screwing and screwing – no need to pull at all.

  7. Henry Gee says:

    I seem to have had a sheltered life. I was always told that you had to pull before you screwed.

  8. Cath Ennis says:

    The screwpull is great, but I don’t have one. I favour the ‘Hallelujah’-type corkscrew myself. I don’t really know what you mean by solid and ‘open’ type screws though, but ours looks like the one in your picture.
    My husband prefers the wine-knife type.

  9. Åsa Karlström says:

    oh geez… I like the one that is similar to the wine knife one but with a proper handle 😉
    but I have to admit, I’ve got both at home. (if it’s between the two types you put there I’d probably use the top one more… uncomfy handle)

  10. Richard Wintle says:

    What about just twisting the cap off, or alternatively using the little plastic spigot on the side of the carton?

  11. Ian Brooks says:

    Beer.
    Seriously, WTF?!
    But I must entertain the sexy laydees listen to jazz, I use this

  12. Cath Ennis says:

    This probably isn’t helping much, eh Richard?

  13. Eva Amsen says:

    I prefer the “hallelujah” type (open) but I only own the other type, because I got one of those for free once and I don’t have wine at home often enough to validate buying a more anthropomorphic opener.

  14. Richard P. Grant says:

    No Cath, it’s all good: I’m taking notes.

  15. Mike Fowler says:

    Due to my incredible funding sources, I have a man someone to help me with these things

    A vivid imagination, sometime in the future

  16. Lisa Bailey says:

    As someone who worked in hospitality for a decade through Uni, I can tell you that the waiters friend is the way to go!

    Needs to have a properly sharp knife though.

  17. Audra McKinzie says:

    Nothing beats the Screwpull 200…except maybe the Screwpull 400, because bigger numbers means it’s better! This product is especially useful for aging alcoholics with arthritis or tendonitis.
    However, when shopping for a Screwpull, one must be careful to select a model that does not simply unscrew itself upin employing the lever action. Yes, I have been burned before.
    However, living in Australia, this conversation is almost entirely academic. These days, my screwpull is just collecting dust…

  18. Audra McKinzie says:

    Dangit.

  19. Richard P. Grant says:

    I think I’ve experienced your bottle opener once, Audra. I believe the phrase I used subsequently was
    “Never again”.
    I mean, it just looks scary.

  20. Brian Clegg says:

    I’m with Audra – Screwpulls are wonderful… except you have to watch the plastic handle version, as I’ve had one snap on me. Not nice.

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