The big news on the BBC World Service (and elsewhere)this morning was that their desks had been shaken by an earthquake. I reckon this doesn’t look good for God.
In olden days, when God got upset, He would shake the heav’ns and the earth, the sea and the dry land, and make ev’ry mountain and hill low (which must be a bummer if you’re one of those who tries to follow the instruction to “tellest good tidings to Zion” by getting “up into the high mountain”). When he got really angry, he would smite races, flood the lands, and even burn the odd bush.
Nowadays when He gets angry, He still tries to shake the earth, but only seems to manage to rattle a few plates. God is evidently not dead but just rather weakened: a diety of sorrows, and acquainted with grief.
I do wonder what the poor folk of Market Rasen did to suffer His wrath. Follow up on “All we like sheep” a bit too far? Or was He aiming for Scunthorpe?
Definitely Scunthorpe, which comes close to Sodom in the telephone directory, and concerning which town Billy Connolly’s comments are, sadly, unprintable on a community website.
Hey, careful. I’m from that part of the world. My home town’s motto is “Grimsby: it reeks of fish, but it’s not as bad as Scunthorpe”.
Skegness is, actually, even closer than Scunthorpe to Sodom. Alphabetically speaking.
Matt – Grimsby is rather close to Gommorah in the dictionary.
Henry – I think I finally understand why Skeggy was such a popular holiday resort.
I must now admit that I was brought up next to Scunthorpe, so I feel justified in being rude about the place (although, unlike Grimsby, at least the football team used to play in the town). Much that is said about the place is true, and the rest is being generous. One day I should return, just to remind myself why I left.
You can get good fish and chips in Grimsby and Skegness.
Plus the Gibraltar Point wildlife reserve is rather romantic, in a bleak and dreary sort of way. In January, at least.